I stumbled on your words.
I wasn’t looking. But somewhere an age ago on my own back pages you had made a comment and left behind the inevitable avatar footprint. Relationships leave so many tracks these digital days.
Without really thinking I found myself at your blog.
It is completely you. I mean, it reflects you. How I remember you anyway. Elegant, feminine, uncluttered, intelligent and creative. A sense of style. Sending a statement of who you are. I felt impressed, but then I always was.
I wasn’t going to read anything.
I don’t want to know about your life now. Your successes, your lovers, your writing, your photographs, your music, all your dreams coming true. But I couldn’t help myself. I scrolled down through the entries. I have always liked the way you write.
There are posts which I was temporarily certain were about me. Yet I rationalised, looking at the dates, too much time had passed for it to possibly be so. I felt an inevitable stab of jealousy that someone else could have stirred you to write words that I would have cherished. Words that I would have been so proud to inspire.
And a small part of me clings to the hope, ridiculous I know, that I am in your mind every now and again as you tap at your keyboard
I didn’t stay for long. Although it is a public site it still seemed like prying. And I had this strange feeling you would somehow discover me there. A dark and now unwelcome stranger, lurking amongst your pages.
A shadow in your sunlight.
I will not return.
© the author writing as Romantic Dominant
Photo stolen from iNeedChemicalX